Stress should not be our accepted resting state

art via Martina Martian

We are stressing ourselves right the fuck out of enjoying life, do you ever think about that?

I'm not in the business of normalizing being stressed out, overwhelmed, overworked, overbooked. I wish no one normalized that. Can we stop normalizing that?

We've all seen, identified with, felt, or shared this meme:

We can't be all the things all the time and we can't do all the things well all the time. No one is getting a prize for how much they can handle, so what are we even doing to ourselves and what message are we sending to our peers and the little people looking up at us and watching how we live?

Being stressed out tricks us into staying where we think we're needed instead of where we want to be and into putting others before ourselves most of the time. Women especially. We have to do some things, certainly, but we are 100% doing this to ourselves. And we need to stop. We're putting too much pressure on ourselves and it's negatively manifesting itself mentally and physically in all of us. 

What if we all spent just 25% more of our time doing what we want to do (even if that is doing nothing) and being where we want to be? And when we spent that 25% more time doing what we want to do and being where we want to be, we didn't feel the need to explain that or excuse that to anyone? And when we spent 25% more time feeding our souls, that would pay off in being in a better position mentally, physically, and emotionally to handle all the shit life throws at us?

Puffing ourselves up like we're the busiest and omg so stressed is usually just us unconsciously signalling to others that we are important, because doesn't society tell us we are important when we are busy and stressed? That is such bullshit and we've all bought into it. We've not only bought into it, we're teaching it to kids - little kids have fucking anxiety that they don't need to be having at young ages. 

Listen carefully: 

You are important on your own, not just in relation to other people or because you're someone's partner or mom or employee. You are important if you have free time and not much to do right now. You hold value all the time, not just in your busy seasons or when you're making things easier for other people. You are important on the days you don't even look at a to do list let alone accomplish a task. You are important when you're sitting on the couch, not only when you're kicking ass and taking names.

Instead of commiserating over stress, let's bond over finding balance and what we are outside of the things we do for the roles we play in our lives. That's the real me and that's the real you, not how much is on our to do lists.

I hope you have some time to just be this weekend. Enjoy!