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Friday, June 30, 2017

Shit MFD Said Vol. 42

MFD: Steph. You should be in the FBI.
Me: Why?
MFD: I just think so.
Me: No.
MFD: Why not?
Me: I don't like perps. Or guns.
MFD: That's too bad. I think you'd be a good fit. 

Me: I honestly can't believe I'm asking this but do you have nail clippers here?
MFD: ha ha. I don't know

On the beach
MFD: Do you have a pen?
Me: No.
MFD: Why not?
Me: Does this look like an office? Why do you need a pen?
MFD: I wanted to write you a note. To share an observation.
Me: You could just tell me.
MFD: No.
he was afraid people would hear him...I could barely hear him

Coming home from Hank's 40th
MFD: It was nice to see everyone.
Me: It was!
MFD: I didn't take any pictures.
Me: Me neither.
MFD: Pics or it didn't happen so I guess it didn't happen.

Getting ready to leave for the shore
MFD: Do we have an iron there?
Me: Nope. Have you ever been there?
MFD: oof
A few minutes later
MFD: We do have wrinkle release there, right? Hon?
Me: Yes mike. You've used it there many times.

Me: What is this movie?
MFD: Just some kid's coming of age movie.
Me: What's the name of it?
MFD: I don't know.
Me: The remote is right next to you.
Presses guide, I see Stephen King's it, he is grinning
Me: No. No no no fucking way.
MFD: It's day!
Me: No.
MFD: It's fake.
Me: No. There's a terrifying clown with razor teeth, the image of my worst nightmares, that lives in a fucking drain.
MFD: So turn it off then?

Gets up and runs downstairs, out the door down there, and back inside
Me: What are you doing?
MFD: I have to go pick up a seller's disclosure.
Me: Why did you go downstairs and out that door instead of just going out the front?
MFD: I'll be back
A few seconds later
Amplified voice outside SLOW DOWN
I get up and see him standing on our street with a megaphone
Me: Mike!
MFD: 

uncontrollable laughter
Me: Mike!
MFD: What? If they're not speeding, I won't say anything to them 
Later
Me: Are you going to do this every night?
MFD: Maybe.
Later
MFD: I'm leaving this megaphone at the front door.
Me: Maybe you should get a sandwich board sign too.
MFD: Yeah I was thinking that.
Me: I was just kidding.
MFD: Not me.





All read and approved by MFD before they go live...
Shit MFD Said Vol 1, Shit MFD Said Vol 2, Shit MFD Said Vol 3, Shit MFD Said Vol 4
Shit MFD Said Vol 5, Shit MFD Said Vol 6, Shit MFD Said Vol 7, Shit MFD Said Vol 8
Shit MFD Said Vol 9, Shit MFD Said Vol 10, Shit MFD Said Vol 11, Shit MFD Said Vol 12, Shit MFD Said Vol 13, Shit MFD Said Vol 14, Shit MFD Said Vol 15, Shit MFD Said Vol 16, Shit MFD Said Vol 17, Shit MFD Said Vol 18, Shit MFD Said Vol 19, Shit MFD Said Vol 20, Shit MFD Said Vol 21, Vol 22, Vol 23, Vol 24, Vol 25, Vol 26, Vol 27, Vol 28, Vol 29, Vol 30, Vol 31, Vol 32, Vol 33, Vol 34, Vol 35, Vol 36, Vol 37, Vol 38, Vol 39, Vol 40, Vol 41

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26 comments:

  1. Kay R.June 30, 2017 at 1:48 AM

    The video slayed me hahahaha #slowdown

    ReplyDelete
  2. BLovedBostonJune 30, 2017 at 7:04 AM

    The nail clippers...every single time :) xo, Biana -BlovedBoston

    ReplyDelete
  3. Linda SheridanJune 30, 2017 at 7:13 AM

    I need him in our neighborhood ❣️Slow down. Stop at Stop signs. Mike Doyle is an UNPAID public servant always. Continued Godspeed ❣️ A happy way to start the day. A safe and sound and joyful weekend to all.
    Love. Your. Momma.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Heather @ The Maritime ReaderJune 30, 2017 at 7:31 AM

    OMG that video is hilarious. Could there be a funnier person to read about? I doubt it. Hahaha. This post just made my day.

    ReplyDelete
  5. LaurieJune 30, 2017 at 9:00 AM

    MFD never disappoints!! Happy Friday!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ashley @ The Wandering WeekendersJune 30, 2017 at 10:02 AM

    Haha I love that he was using the megaphone to yell at people!

    ReplyDelete
  7. KristinJune 30, 2017 at 10:06 AM

    "It's day" LOLOLOL

    Your nail clipper situation is our tweezer situation. We had at least 5 pairs around a few months ago and now I know of one.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Rebecca JoJune 30, 2017 at 10:32 AM

    YEAHHHHH - IT is totally a 'coming of age movie' - it was a coming of age of me being terrified of clown my whole life!!!!
    ... I literally LOL'ed at the nail clipper comment... I think we all need to chip in & every person buy clippers & send to him for Christmas ;)

    ReplyDelete
  9. StephanieJune 30, 2017 at 10:52 AM

    That video is AMAZING, oh my god

    ReplyDelete
  10. Nichole @ casadecrews.comJune 30, 2017 at 11:28 AM

    My fave series. No way could I watch IT again here, either. Nope, Nope, Nope.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Ali ArnoneJune 30, 2017 at 12:18 PM

    This may have been my favorite installment of this. I can't express in words how much I enjoyed your husband YELLING AT PEOPLE ON THE STREET WITH A MEGAPHONE. This man is a keeper; honestly for the blog material alone.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Audrey LouiseJune 30, 2017 at 12:28 PM

    "Pics or it didn't happen so I guess it didn't happen." HAHAHAHA.
    Also, Kyle and I usually text each other when he has something to tell me and people are around. Lol!

    ReplyDelete
  13. llf1020June 30, 2017 at 1:55 PM

    Your being a good fit for the FBI. Just awesome. Jack tries that shit with horror movies on t.v. Just no.

    ReplyDelete
  14. sara [at] journey of doingJune 30, 2017 at 2:40 PM

    LMAO. The megaphone. The slow down. And everything else in this is a win as well.

    I'll be over here on the floor until the next Shit MFD Says.

    ReplyDelete
  15. BrianneJune 30, 2017 at 3:40 PM

    Hahaha I love that the tables have turned & you asked him for clippers.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Amber KJune 30, 2017 at 5:29 PM

    LOL the megaphone! Can he come down here and ask people to use their turn signals?

    ReplyDelete
  17. Laura DarlingJune 30, 2017 at 10:20 PM

    Cracking up at the pen on the beach. Love that he wanted to write you a note!! Must have been super confidential.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Laura DarlingJune 30, 2017 at 10:23 PM

    Also adding a second comment because I just watched the SLOW DOWN video and I am cracking up. That's the funniest thing I've seen all week.

    ReplyDelete
  19. booksandcandyJuly 2, 2017 at 8:25 AM

    like I said on twitter I was going to watch this while in the waiting room for Physical Therapy. I couldn't get past the first 2 without controlling my laughter and I was getting strange looks.
    Thanks for making me laugh

    ReplyDelete
  20. UnknownJuly 3, 2017 at 11:17 AM

    In regards to the "observation," he could have texted it to you. LOL! Also, show him this:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c5aE8RhIqaU

    ReplyDelete
  21. CJuly 3, 2017 at 11:46 PM

    I loved the megaphone video! That's hilarious. Jacob and I share our observations and "let's get out of here" signals via text. Haha!

    ReplyDelete
  22. Three of CupsJuly 5, 2017 at 4:26 PM

    hahahahahahahahahahaha!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Heather LockhartJuly 5, 2017 at 4:39 PM

    The nail clipper saga is my favorite saga. AT this point he should have 6 or 7 nail clippers strategically placed in your home and car, right??

    ReplyDelete
  24. Emily @ Martinis | BikinisJuly 5, 2017 at 9:16 PM

    HAA!! Don't know where to start but every conversation or comment initiated from MFD is hilarious. The megaphone is TOO funny!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Steph GJuly 5, 2017 at 10:05 PM

    I'm so happy that a video exists of the megaphone. I love it.

    ReplyDelete
  26. The Girl who Loved to WriteJuly 10, 2017 at 7:47 AM

    Laughing so hard at SLOW DOWN. Also I love that without fail, we always get a good nail clippers comment.

    ReplyDelete

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