Kim arrived from Boston and we attended a Friday night viewing for our friend Mike, then we slunk through Target and ate our sad feelings at Brother's.
Saturday morning mass and funeral luncheon. It is always so great to see everyone and always so terrible when the circumstances are a funeral. People live in my memories and I can always see them at various points in our lives, but the first thing that goes for me is a what a person's voice sounds like. It was good to hear so many voices again. Mike wrote a song way back when and two of the other Mikes sang it at the luncheon. It was very appropriate. I used to not understand post-funeral lunches. As an adult I understand how important it is to gather, remember, and share a laugh in an informal setting after a funeral service. It's the turn for most of us. And I was extremely happy to finally meet KVSR's little angel baby Natalia.
I spent the next hour and a half crying up the NJ Turnpike. I just needed to get a big ass cry out and I did. It was cleansing and exhausting. Not so exhausting that I couldn't hoard Laura & Chris's baby for the next hour and a half. The newest Michael in my life was born on Friday at 10 lb 13 oz. I adore that his initials are MBD - which in his case of course also stands for Major Big Deal - and I love him so much already. That black square is covering up his don't steal this baby monitor. Technology is awesome.
Kim went north to Boston and I went south on the Garden State Parkway to the shore. It was a shitty, rainy drive, and I was over it by the time I got there but wired from swirling emotions and coffee in addition to renter noise so I was up past midnight. Sunday I slept in until almost 10 and then hit the beach and the boardwalk for a little. If you go to Ocean City, you should check out the L.E.H. soap shop on the boardwalk. The two I got smell delicious.
The rest of Sunday I spent cleaning up the efficiency, cleaning out the alley, going to Big Lots for cutting boards/coffee/dog toys, painting my nails, and eating a meatball sandwich from Voltaco's with CSI Miami in the background. Missed you, over dramatic Horatio. I left the shore around 8.
Weekly food prep: breakfast is english muffins topped with PB and bananas; lunch is Wawa salads; and I'll figure dinner out along the way.
I'm sorry for your loss. Singing one of his songs sounds like a great way to honor him.
ReplyDeleteThat meatball hoagie looks so good!
How amazing that you celebrated two lives this weekend! xo, biana -BlovedBoston
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry, again that you lost your friend, but I'm glad that there were so many people who showed up to show how much he was loved. I agree about the luncheon--we had one after my dad's funeral and it was actually a really happy time to get to gather together and feel that support after the emotional funeral.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad that the rest of your weekend had some bright spots, even if it wasn't with the weather (seriously rain go away!!!) And you have my mouth watering with that meatball sandwich photo!
I am very sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteI am the same way about voices, I always remember what people sounded like.
New babies are the best. Major Big Deal had me laughing! Love it!
I am glad you got to say goodbye in a comforting way. That song is beautiful!
ReplyDeleteI think what you said about the way you feel at funerals really just sums up life. It's sad and it's happy and it's unexpected and hard and beautiful...and it keeps going.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for your loss. That song is beautiful. The luncheon was a wonderful way to celebrate how much your friend meant to you all. May you find comfort in your memories of your beloved friend.
ReplyDeleteI love the LEH soaps, and Jersey Girl, is my favorite! Such a great scent!
ReplyDeleteCircle of life. Big time. One Michael swapped for another Michael ! Michael Dotta is on the other side with MBD's Grandpop Michael. So many Michaels. Each one very special and unique. Big cries in the car are the best. I hate when you cry , but it's very cleansing ! Such a release. Hate the red eyes, though. When one of my chicken's peers goes to the other side- it turns my hormones on fiercely. Glorious to be able to hold and love and celebrate MBD! Thanks to the universe for that joy. And meeting baby Natalia. Love you all to infinity and beyond. Your. Momma.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about the passing of your friend...letting a good cry out is sometimes needed for the soul. Luckily you had baby Michael around to brighten things up a bit. The efficiency is looking awesome!
ReplyDeleteI can't believe we are almost to memorial day. This spring has flown by!
ReplyDeleteAlso, I firmly believe in the cleansing power of a good cry...preferably when done alone.
Most definitely a circle of life weekend. It always sad that it seems like the only time we see some old friends is at funerals. And I never used to understand the power of a good, cleansing cry but I do now.
ReplyDeleteWhat an up and down weekend. Glad you got to see both babies! Love that picture of you, Kim, Laura and MBD.
ReplyDeleteYou are so right - I never got the 'food after funeral' thing but it is a good place to sit & have fellowship with others - hear stories, laugh, cry, all with others around.
ReplyDeletei'm glad you got that good cry out & then finished it up with a baby holding session - that's good medicine. My grandma always used to tell me - one in, one out... that made me think of her with your weekend of a funeral & a new baby.
I'm not usually a meatball sub fan but that looks delicious.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry for the loss of your friend :( That' so hard. I'm glad you had some warm, familiar friends around this weekend. And snuggling a baby is always good for the soul!
The circle of life is really interesting. And I love that song he wrote. How neat that they sang it. We do miss out on voices, that's something I don't really think about. A good cry is a necessity, I had one last week.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you were able to cry it out - everyone needs a good cry. :) how cool that the other Mikes performed his song. What an amazing tribute to such a young life gone too soon.
ReplyDeleteThings that are nicer than my house: the efficiency.
ReplyDeleteQuite a weekend you had. I feel I have nothing more to add since we've already talked about most of this. But I'm glad you got the cleansing cry out and there's sometimes nothing like a baby to make you feel better.
Working from home + homemade donuts?! Yes please! Can't wait for the recipe tomorrow! Sorry for your loss, and sending more *hugs* your way. It's always great to see those you don't see very often, but it's so hard when it's under such sad circumstances. <3
ReplyDeleteSometimes all you really need is a really good cry. I know that sometimes it'll make me feel better, especially after something terrible has happened. And I'm glad that you went to the lunch afterwards. It really can be so wonderful to talk about it with other people, and your memories are how you can keep your lost friends and loved ones alive.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for your loss! I think actually having a good cry can really help, though. Sending you some hugs!
ReplyDeleteSorry again for your loss - sometimes we all do need a really good cry. Have I ever mentioned you always seem to have the BUSIEST weekends? Yesterday I literally cleaned and went food shopping and felt like I ran the NYC marathon and needed a break. #Lazy
ReplyDeletehomemade donuts and working from home sound like the makings of a perfect day. I can't wait for that recipe. I totally feel you on the big cry. feels so good afterward! xx
ReplyDeleteYou know, I never understood the gathering that took place after a funeral either when I was younger. I always felt like why would people want to continue to be sad after that event. But truth is, usually you end up sharing stories and bring smiles of the memories. It has been a long time since I have been to Big Lots for anything, I need to creep mine out soon. Patiently awaiting your donut recipe. I never did go get that damn donut baking tray I saw. Need to do that!
ReplyDeleteMan, you really hit both ends of the spectrum this weekend! Glad you got to reminisce and also meet a new baby.
ReplyDeleteThat meatball sub looks fucking fantastic.
ReplyDeleteThat song. Whoa. I can only imagine the emotions filling that room when your/his friends played that song.
Certainly sounds like an emotionally draining weekend.
ReplyDeletePizza is the best comfort food though.
To have something like that song after someone is gone always bring both a smile and tears for me. I love having that special piece of them and being able to hear their voice and imagine them saying/singing whatever it is. Sounds like you made the best out of an emotional weekend and I would have needed the cleaning, too. Love that polish color! We have Wawas down here, but I've never tried their salads.
ReplyDeleteRelaxing at the shore is a great way to ease back into life after a day of sadness.
ReplyDeleteThe weather here is still very early spring and with 7 days of school left I'm going to need summer to get here soon. I have plans of chasing sunrises, sunsets, and full moons with my camera and I want to do it in shorts and flip flops!
I have soaps from that place! I thought the label looked familiar and then saw RB. My FIL is a fan. Your efficiency is so nice and welcoming and better than any hotel I could imagine. And holy chubby baby, they are always the cutest. Yay for a new "nephew!"
ReplyDeleteThe inevitable reunions surrounding funerals are SO bittersweet. And I'm glad you had a good cry, I have no doubt that that was what you needed in that moment. I am so very sorry, again, for your loss. Your efficiency studio looks wonderful and I bet the beach was a good place to center yourself again (save for the renter noise).
ReplyDeletemmmmm meatball sandwich. i love how the dogs stand on either side of you, and Mae is laying down. so cute. and i laughed at the don't steal this baby monitor. so cool. that song is beautiful, and i didn't really understand the gathering/lunch after a funeral until i got older. it's hard to let go, and it's nice to be surrounded by people who share the same grief as you, i think. for a short time.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for your loss. A post funeral gather is a great honor. We do one every year for my grandma and we all cry a little, but laugh a lot! It's important.
ReplyDelete-Linds