Fiddling with the Roku
Me: Press Start here.
MFD: Do I press begin
now?
Me: That's what I
said.
MFD: No, you said
start here.
Me: Same thing!
MFD: No.
Always looking for
dollar bills in our house
Me: I actually have a
lot of ones right now.
MFD: What, did you go
to a strip club?
Me: What? I...no.
On a chilly spring day
MFD: It's cold. Right
Gussie? Maybe put the heat on?
Me: The heat is on.
MFD: Really? Who are
you, Glenn Frey or something?
Me: Why?
MFD: singing the heat
is on...the heat is onnn. The heat is on ooh it's on the streets
Me: I get it now.
Yelling up the stairs
MFD: Hey Steph?
Me: What?
MFD: I uh, happened
to notice there was some chocolate brought home from a shower on Sunday? Where
would that chocolate be now?
Me: I don't know what
you're talking about.
MFD: Yeah. Chocolate.
In clear coffee mugs.
Minutes later
MFD: Did you take it
to work?
Me: Yes. There might
be some in the basement.
MFD: What?
Minutes later
MFD: Was that like a
wild goose chase you sent me on?
Me: You actually looked?
MFD: Yes.
Purger vs. hoarder
Me: When can you go
to Goodwill?
MFD: For what?
Me: To drop off all
the stuff I'm getting rid of.
MFD: Wait! Books! We
can take them to the shore.
Me: Paperbacks only.
MFD: James Patterson!
Robert Frost!
Me: Mike. No.
MFD: I want to read
them all.
Me: Here. Read this Henry James book. Go ahead. Read the first paragraph.
He reads it
MFD: Maybe not that one. Definitely the rest.
Me: You know what? I think I'll just go to Goodwill.
MFD: Did you see Steve's glasses?
Me: No.
MFD: The funeral director's glasses were cool too.
Me: Were they? I didn't see.
MFD: I want new glasses. I don't think I have the coolest glasses anymore.
Fitting day for a Shit MFD Said given MFD's devotion to Star Wars. May the Fourth be with you.
Fitting day for a Shit MFD Said given MFD's devotion to Star Wars. May the Fourth be with you.
All read and approved by MFD before they go live...
Shit MFD Said Vol 1, Shit MFD Said Vol 2, Shit MFD Said Vol 3, Shit MFD Said Vol 4
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