Wednesday, March 2, 2016

Maelee: A Peanut Butter Caper


A Maelee is sort of like its word of origin, melee, except it's caused by Mae. Or maybe it should be a Haelee, since Mae's boss bitch alter ego Hazel has likely instigated it.

Last night I walked into a Maelee when I got home instead of the typical howling dog ruckus that greets me every time I open the door. Gus and Geege came over to tell on Mae, who was by the entertainment center growling...to protect her open jar of peanut butter.

How the hell did they get an open jar of peanut butter? 

I won't lie, I thought MFD left in a hot hurry with the peanut butter open and accessible to these scavengers. Then I walked into the kitchen, saw the pantry open, found the lid to the jar in the dining room, and called MFD in disbelief.

In the 20 minutes between MFD leaving the house and me walking in the door, these ahole dogs opened the pantry, got a jar of peanut butter off the second shelf, opened it (like, unscrewed the top, not bit into it) in the dining room, and brought the jar into the living room where Hazel was lording over it like the Wicked Queen of Skippy. 

know they can tell time, but now they act like they have thumbs? Was this a three amigos team effort? Did they use the furniture as a tool? Did Tuesday use its black magic on their behalf? Was it the old man from Scooby Doo? Did aliens help? So many questions...I need them to start talking.

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