It's not a coincidence that American Horror Story and AmericanHomeShield share the same initials

I had a big long post with a timeline of this entire Life in the Tundra: Surviving Without Heat for Eight Days shitshow typed out but I deleted it. No one wants a blow by blow account of me being without heat from 8 pm on Thursday, January 8, until 7:30 pm on Friday, January 16. If you do, email me and I will give you one but you'll be sorry. It'll be whinier than Grandpa Joe laid up in bed in Willy Wonka.

We have a home warranty with American Home Shield. We've been customers for two years and have had satisfactory dealings with them in the past. Our previous claims have been small. This one was big. And they shit the bed handling it.

What I want you to take away from this blog post if you're a business person is that customer service is important, and what I want you to take away from this blog post if you're a consumer is that you do not want to sign up for a home warranty with American Home Shield.

Because American Home Shield dicked around looking for a non-existent part for a 20 year old heater for over two DAYS while we froze in our home. Hey American Home Shield, you had ONE job. 

It being January in Pennsylvania, temperatures were below 30 for seven out of eight days the heat was off (except the day heat was restored, naturally) with windchill in the single digits a few of those days. When I asked their reps if they would be comfortable in a 46 degree house, I was met with silence on the other end of the line. More than once. 

My main complaints against American Home Shield:

1. The contractor came out early on Monday (our choice, not an up front delay), contacted American Home Shield and told them what part was needed. As of Thursday, AHS was still looking for the part. No lie. Oh yes, still looking. Really?  REALLY? Still looking even with your vast supplier reach? I don't fucking think so. Remember the temperatures, everyone. Anyone with a brain knows that it doesn't take more than two days to find a freaking part. If you couldn't find it by noon on Tuesday, you probably weren't going to find it. Which means they dragged their feet on this issue because it was expensive for them. Even though it meant we froze.

2. Four different AHS agents asked me, "Is this your only source of heat?" SERIOUSLY? First of all, YES, secondly, WHY? You have a responsibility to fix the heater in a timely manner regardless of if I'm sleeping in a bed of hot coals. We had space heaters lent to us and there was no way I was telling them that - if I did we'd probably still be without heat.

3. They were VERY fucking lackadaisical about us being without heat for so long. Like oh, nothing more we can do except look for the part, laid back and relaxed, probably sitting in an 80 degree office in a tank top while I was wearing two layers and freaking out about the possibility of the pipes bursting in our house.

4. They waited until Wednesday - SIX DAYS after my initial call - to tell me I could spend up to $100 on space heaters and be reimbursed. Thank you, I will, even though the three space heaters I can buy with that allotment will warm my three story house about as much as a hot fart would.

5. Six days without heat and countless phone calls in, I finally lost my faith that AHS was going to do right by me. I am a quick tempered impatient asshole most days, and I really held my zen on this for six long, cold days (with Laura out of the country, and she is usually the person telling me to remain sane).

I was proud. I felt good and patient. And on the sixth day, I lost it.

In order to get the customer service I was entitled to being a contract holder, I had to mount a social media campaign (if you helped, thank you). AHS flat out deleted two of my posts on their facebook page, and deleted many comments from others on my one post that remained. That is a major red flag and social media no no for businesses. If you cannot stand tall and respond to customer complaints and work to fix issues, you're doing it wrong. All it does is tell people you have something to hide.

Fortunately for me you can't delete tweets, and I learned through twitter that another woman named Stephanie in Philadelphia has been without repair on her heater for SIX WEEKS. I thought we had it bad. That is a fucking disgrace. Even worse? The AHS policy of repair band aiding instead of replacement caused a fire and she had to run out of her house with her baby. All totally avoidable. And they are STILL looking for parts in her case. How about replace the entire thing especially since it was already on fire once? COME ON. There's a baby and a dog in that house, not to mention adults. Twitter friends, please help this lady out. I'd ask you to help her out on Facebook, but the below took place last night and as of today they've blocked her from commenting on their facebook page. No lie. These people are unbelievable.

Found beneath my post on the American Home Shield Facebook page

AHS is looking for replacement parts for this heater...that was on fire from previous band aid fixes

5. On the seventh day they finally assigned me a handler, someone who called me, gave me her number, and told me she'd be working with me all day. She proceeded to never return two of my phone calls later that afternoon. She called MFD instead. Was I flashing up on their phone systems as DANGEROUS CALL by that time? Probably. Guess what? I don't care. You invoked my wrath and now you have to deal with it. But since she didn't, back to Twitter I went. The pressure worked and the very next day our heater was replaced, less than 24 hours after I started pointing out to the world wide web how fucked up it was that by taking no action, American Home Shield was basically giving off the vibe that they didn't care if we froze.

I'm sorry that what we thought would be a small repair ended up costing them thousands. But that's their very business and dragging their feet because they didn't want to make the big repair is unforgivable. Even though they did the right thing in the end, their handling of this incident left a bad taste in my mouth. I feel like I was lied to on more than a few occasions. I feel like they half assed it at our expense, and they're out there doing it to other customers as we speak. 

If you have a mind to, please share this post on Facebook and/or Twitter so no other families find themselves with no heat and at the mercy of this company in the dead of winter. I know they need to watch their bottom line, but not at the expense of the health and well being of their customers. That's not a sustainable business model. 

Sorry AHS, I'm not an idiot, and you abused my patience so I had to release the hounds on you. People shouldn't have to do that in order for you to do your job. 

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