Life According to Steph: Shit MFD Said Vol. 13

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Nobody puts MFD in a corner

Via text

Me: The basement is a pee and poop apocalypse.

MFD: I hate that.

Me: I stepped in poop.

MFD: You got turned.

MFD: ha turded

Me: Yes. I got turded.

Walking in the door

MFD: What are you, a lumberjack?

Me: It's called buffalo check.

MFD: What is?

Me: The pattern. It's called buffalo check.
MFD: And lumberjack too.

Buffalo check. AKA lumberjack.

Lots of whisper cursing in bathroom, 11 p.m.

Me: What the hell is going on in there?

MFD: Trying to get an ingrown hair in my neck. It's in deep. It's like they retreat. Can they do that?

Me: I don't know, Mike.

Watching some Rocky

MFD: Talia Shire was hot. When I was little I thought she was ugly. I guess because she played an ugly character, you know?

Me: Mmm

MFD: Don't you think she's pretty?

Me: Mmm

In the midst of decorating for Christmas

The balls went up before the lights, which led to...

MFD: These lights are WRONG! Can you come help me with these balls in my face?

Me: hahahahaha. Hahahaha. hahahahhahahahahahaaha.

Later

Me: These dogs hate Christmas because their house is torn apart.

MFD: I don't really care. Muttering I'll make these freaking lights work!

See how genius I am with the balls? See also MFD's middle finger.

On deck, first day of the cruise
MFD: Steph, I see why these bathing suits didn't sell. It's kind of see through.

Me: No it's not. Well, maybe a little.

MFD: Down one suit.

Waiting in line for the monorail

MFD: Look! 20% off! (shows me phone)

Me: 20% off what?

MFD: Groupons.

Me: Oh my God with the Groupons. Put the phone away!

Getting his bag checked at EPCOT after building droids at Hollywood Studios. Woman opens the bag

MFD: Those aren't the Droids you're looking for.

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Haikuesday
My brain is foggy.
Post-vacation thoughts askew.
Spotlight on real life.
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