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Thursday, September 29, 2011

The Fake Holy Will Roll You

This morning, I was heading towards the ticket area of Suburban Station when I heard "If my skin was pink like his you would not be accusing me of this!" The indignant shouter sounded very familiar. He went on to yell, "What are you, Egyptian? No one cares what you think!" Oh thank you tiny hypocrisy loving sweet baby Jesus, it WAS him! The 16th & Market preacher was being a  douche in the train station! And by a great stroke of luck, I was there to see it.

Holy roller tried to roll SEPTA out of cash.

When I got to the window, I had an enlightening conversation with the woman who helped me.

Me: That guy is crazy.

SEPTA lady: Oh I know it, we all know him, that's why two managers are over there. He goes from station to station telling us we shorted him change and owe him cash.

Me: GET OUT! You do know he preaches holiness and truth up on the street at 16th & Market, right?

SEPTA lady: Really? When?

Me: All day! You've got to get above ground.

SEPTA lady (over her shoulder): Rhonda, we got to get up to the street during break today. Crazy Man is a Street Preacher, telling everybody about their sins!

tra la la la la la la la la. I love witnessing hypocrisy. I can't wait until that mofo yells out about thiefs and sinners when I'm walking by, spittle flying out of his gross lying mouth. As the great Tennessee Williams once said, "The only thing worse than a liar is a liar who is a hypocrite."

Now, good day. I SAID GOOD DAY!

Hallelujiah and amen,

SMD

p.s. FRIDAY EVE. Thank you.

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