MFD: Resting bitch face.
Me: I have it.
MFD: So does Prince.
MFD: Did I bring you the right scarf?
Me: Yes.
MFD: When I took down the box with the scarves in it I was like, "Whoa! Am I married to Stevie Nicks?"
 |
| Stevie Nicks box after he rooted through it |
MFD: So my glasses that I thought I lost? They were just under the bed where I kind of thought they were. I looked there before and they weren't there but I looked today and they were there.
Me: Hmm.
10:18 pm, bed
Me: Are you eating?
MFD: Hey! It's Fat Tuesday.
Me: Your hair is enormous.
MFD: I know! I'm intentionally not cutting it. It's too cold. I'm not cutting my hair.
One day later comes home with hair cut
Me: Ow! Owwww!
MFD: What's wrong?
Me: Mae's nail is caught in my hair.
MFD: Did you get it out?
Me: Yes.
MFD: Good. I thought we were going to have to call the wahmbulance.
Me: You forgot my lemon meringue!
MFD: Oh. I'll go back up in a little.
Me: Why not now? It's my birthday!
MFD: I have to wait. I might have to fart.
Me: I'd rather you do it here but walk away.
MFD: Crop dust?
Cue everyone singing happy birthday and me dying inside while MFD sings along and laughs gleefully
Me: You forgot my lemon meringue!
MFD: Oh. I'll go back up in a little.
Me: Why not now? It's my birthday!
MFD: I have to wait. I might have to fart.
Me: I'd rather you do it here but walk away.
MFD: Crop dust?
Cue everyone singing happy birthday and me dying inside while MFD sings along and laughs gleefully
Me: I'm going to kill you.
MFD: I didn't think they'd sing! How about I said I might have to fart!
Me: You didn't think they'd sing if you asked them to come over with a birthday candle?
MFD: I didn't. No.
MFD: I think I was Canadian in a past life.
Me: Oh yeah?
MFD: I think I was in Canada and I couldn't get out.
Me: Well. Hopefully that's not the case when we go to leave.
MFD: I want them.
Me: You're ridiculous.
MFD: Wait.
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Shit MFD Said Vol 9, Shit MFD Said Vol 10, Shit MFD Said Vol 11, Shit MFD Said Vol 12, Shit MFD Said Vol 13, Shit MFD Said Vol 14, Shit MFD Said Vol 15
MFD: I didn't think they'd sing! How about I said I might have to fart!
Me: You didn't think they'd sing if you asked them to come over with a birthday candle?
MFD: I didn't. No.
MFD: I think I was Canadian in a past life.
Me: Oh yeah?
MFD: I think I was in Canada and I couldn't get out.
Me: Well. Hopefully that's not the case when we go to leave.
MFD: I want them.
Me: You're ridiculous.
MFD: Wait.
Tomorrow, our weekend in Niagara Falls. Wishing you all a Happy St. Patrick's Day today and thinking of my Grandmom, as it was her birthday. I love this picture of us from the way back machine:
All read and approved by MFD before they go live...
Shit MFD Said Vol 1, Shit MFD Said Vol 2, Shit MFD Said Vol 3, Shit MFD Said Vol 4
Shit MFD Said Vol 5, Shit MFD Said Vol 6, Shit MFD Said Vol 7, Shit MFD Said Vol 8
Shit MFD Said Vol 9, Shit MFD Said Vol 10, Shit MFD Said Vol 11, Shit MFD Said Vol 12, Shit MFD Said Vol 13, Shit MFD Said Vol 14, Shit MFD Said Vol 15
These posts are so freakin' entertaining. I kinda (definitely) want the bear cheeks pj's too.
ReplyDeleteWe can be Stevie Nicks together, I love scarves. Wahmbulance! Haha! I might have to fart is a good excuse but I would much rather he crop dust someone else as a general rule. Good trickery though. Trick bottoms for the win. Haha!
ReplyDeleteHe is great.
ReplyDeleteCrop dust for the win! And I'm pretty sure I have "Resting Bitch Face" too, as everyone is always telling me to smile. Ugh...
ReplyDeleteLOL the most hilarious thing is that all that stuff you see in niagra (and places close to the border) are stereotypical "canadian" stuff. no one in the real city wears lumberjack clothing (ok maybe hunters but those peeps are like, wayyyy up north and like, 90 yrs old), our cops are dressed in regular uniform, no one carries or sees a musket unless they're in a historical museum and i have never seen that hat or jacket except in those those Heritage Canada commercials where they show you stuff from the 1800s LOL
ReplyDeleteAlways a fun time! That's the best thing! Canada makes me think of Dudley DoRight and Nell. The way-back machine is Sherman and Mr. Peobody and Rocky and Bullwinkle. Happy birthday, grandmom. She was never a big partier, that;s for sure! Happy St. Patrick's Day!
ReplyDeleteLove, Your Momma
I'm dying of laughter. That's a good way to start this morning. Non-crop dusting and bear cheeks.
ReplyDeleteI'm dying!! These are always the highlights for me - the one with the farting...true to form!! xo, Biana - BlovedBoston
ReplyDeleteAwesome as always! Timely too, as I'm working on the next Shit Aaron Says post. I think my favorite is "Hey! It's Fat Tuesday."
ReplyDeleteHappy birthday to your Grandmom (I love that picture). Today is our niece Julia's birthday - she's 10.
Grown man trap door PJs? Amazing.
ReplyDeleteI love those PJS!!!!! Did he BUY them?????
ReplyDeleteWhy is it that men can't put things back the WAY they found it? Gahhhh!!!! Stevie Nicks - PFffft clearly she would have MORE scarves! (Time to go shopping, in order to live up to his expectations! hehehehe)
That's a wonderful picture of you and your gran.
I saw the title of this post and thought "it must be my birthday!" haha I want those pajamas too....
ReplyDeleteThis is hilarious! I don't think I can pick a favorite because they are all too funny!
ReplyDeletehaha Michael didn't cut his hair for MONTHS. finally he did. now I hate it. hhahaha the farting one.
ReplyDeleteAnother classic post ;) They all made me laugh!! Have a blast in Niagara falls!!! :)
ReplyDeleteBahahaha, the WAHMbulance. I'm stealing that.
ReplyDeleteThose pajamas look exactly like something you'd see in Sitka. People are weirdly obsessed with things with bears on them.
I LOVE these posts! "So does Prince." "Wahmbulance" I am laughing so hard!! I want a pair of those PJ's as well :)
ReplyDeleteHopefully you had a GREAT birthday weekend!
LOL I love the comparisons to Stevie Nicks & Prince.
ReplyDeletehahaha wahmbulance.
ReplyDeletethose pjs are legit. i hope he got them.
love that picture of you and your grandmom from the way back machine :)
now i want a lemon meringue, hold the farting.
Prince has resting bitch face? I had no idea, I just assume he's rich enough to be mysterious.
ReplyDeleteAs I was scrolling to comment...I saw Kathy say " no one in the real city wears lumberjack clothing" and I think that is a lie! Lie lie lie!!! That button butt outfit is hilarious and MFD needs it! Chris always calls the wahmbulance on me...though he doesn't find it as funny when I try to do the same to him. Annddddd I want lemon meringue!!!!
ReplyDeleteStevie Nicks! Prince! Crop dusting! I love these posts!
ReplyDeleteBahaha These are amazing.
ReplyDeleteDid you get him the pjs? Please tell me you bought those!!
ReplyDeleteI swear, you were such a stinking cute kid... it's ridiculous! That little smile!!! :D
ReplyDeleteI'm torn between the farting and pajamas being my fave! lololol
Seriously these posts are hilarious!
ReplyDeleteAnd those pajamas...
This is seriously funny shit! I love these posts
ReplyDeletehaha MFD seriously cracks me up. Me you and prince have that resting B face then. haha and the fart story ... he is too much! PS get him those pjs!
ReplyDelete